I solved it.

So today I was thinking…

and I thought about the subarbs.  And their useless lawns.  And how we seem to be having issues making local, sustainable food available to everybody.  And then I thought some more about all these things.

And then I quickly started formulating a plan to solve the problem of useless lawns and unsustainable tomatoes and having to mow because the grass got an inch taller and tasteless, watery cucumbers.

Here is the plan:

(this plan applies to all people living in the millions of suburban developments with a lawn)

  • forget about grass, plant vegetable plants and fruit trees and flower and plants that will have another use besides being green.
  • if you live in a climate where growing fruits and vegetables is not a viable option spare a few square feet and build a greenhouse.
  • forget that gardening takes more than 10 minutes a day.  All you have to do is freaking water the plants and make sure that the vegetables that grow on vines are tied to posts.  Done.  You are a gardener.
  • if you are so inclined, buy a couple, or three, or four chickens.  Buy a portable coop with a caged enclosure which allows the chickens to roam a bit outside.  Look, you now have fresh eggs nearly every day and low-maintenance pets that the kids will love!  They will also eat the nasty bugs crawling about your now useful land.
And I figure even if only one household would get serious about this stuff a good sized garden would grow enough produce to feed four or five suburban households – end everybody could pitch in helping out!
Does this seem like an extreme plan?  Because I don’t think so.  In fact, I’m going to enact it myself.
Maybe I’m just biased because I really have a thing against lawns.  I just think they are amongst the most useless things human kind has come up with.  What is the purpose of a patch of grass?  (Unless you count mowing it as exercise, which in that case I guess it has a purpose).  I don’t even care if I’m offending anybody, because it’s a fact.  There is no use to lawns – especially since kids barely go outside now.
Instead, we might as well transform these enormous patches of grass (that are more than large enough for a great garden) into an area thriving with life which children would be much more likely to explore and help out with.
Also, because of this abundance of fresh fruits and vegetables people will cut down on meat and eat more fruits and veggies and obesity will go away.
Obviously this plan needs more thought because I’m sort of just writing random thoughts that are coming to me, but you’ve got to admit, it is sort of a good idea.
Anyhow, expect elaborations on this in the future.  Also, expect me to be a chicken owner in the near future.  No joke.